Result!

Let me tell you: no amount of double-bagging was going to save her tonight. Her fingers went straight into it and it remained under her fingernails for the duration of the walk. The downside was that she cut our walk short but it was worth it to see her struggling with the lead in her left hand whilst I insisted on sniffing the hedges on the right. She looked quite ridiculous with the lead stretched across in front of her and most uncomfortable. Now, you see, I know the trick. In future I will repeat what I did tonight; to do it in one place alone is too easy. I calculate that around four piles is far more effective. If there is just one, it is a clean sweep (so to speak). If there are multiple deposits, it is impossible for her to approach the last pile with the same confidence that she will be able to gather it in one stroke with the bag. And so it came to pass this evening. She ended up stroking it alright but not with the bag. Of course, it goes without saying that consistency is an important factor and one that did indeed play a part in tonight's events.

I will sleep soundly tonight knowing that I have got my revenge for all the times she's accidentally kicked me in the snout as she passes from the fridge back to the sink. And she tells people that I'm blind! Even someone who couldn't see would know that I rest my chin on the floor in front of my bed by the time they'd lived with me for six years. Then again, they say that you can't teach an old dog new tricks, don't they?